On February 20, 2024, the CPNV monthly membership meeting and training addressed the topic of triggers that professionals can experience within the collaborative process, presented by Stephanie Smith, Esq., Sarah Goding, Esq., Lynn Hawkins, Esq., and Natalie Goldberg, LCSW. The presentation provided scenarios and role-playing of situations within the collaborative process that can present as triggers for us as professionals.
Examples of triggers in the collaborative process included such scenarios as when one team member might demonstrate dismissive comments and responses to the team. Another situation can be controlling behavior of a team member or a client’s behavioral history can be triggering – in the example of committing adultery. There were other topics shared that provided examples of personal triggers that might sometimes stir up personal bias and/or discomfort. The training also discussed strategies and different ways to handle and manage our reactions when we are triggered.
We were referred to a very informative resource book called “How We Can Stop Reacting and Start Healing: Triggers” by David Richo.
This helpful book is a great resource for collaborative professionals, but also a good resource for our clients. David Richo examines the neuroscience of triggers, the influence of our childhood experiences, and our emotional reactions that can be anger, fear, shame, and sadness. The author provides insight in helping us to understand our response and identifying our mind-body reaction, then helps us to develop strategies, resources, and “tools” to manage these big reactions, stay calm under pressure, and hopefully feel more in control or more able to respond under stress and when triggered.
One specific tool that the author addressed was naming the triggers. This helps us to discern between what happened factually from what impacts us personally. The author suggests things like making a list of our repeated triggers that lead us to look out for them and to have a plan to deal with them. This way, we can make a conscious response rather than react. We can also note our triggers in a journal and our usual reactions. With the language and caveat that in life “this can happen to anyone, and I have many options how I can respond.”
Another tool is to become aware of two reactions we might have to a trigger. The author notes one is a runaway reaction and the other is a moving toward behavior in a grasping or controlling way. Just becoming aware of these two reactions can lower the tension and help us to regroup and address the situation more productively.
Regarding our neurobiology, Richo notes that triggers can create hyperarousal, which affects cortisol and adrenaline in our bodies resulting in “brain negativity.” In this heightened state, it is hard for us to access logical inner resources and hard to self-regulate. It emphasized how important it is to be more aware of our body reactions. Relaxation techniques can be useful interventions: for instance, using a deep breathing response.
I found another meaningful tool that the author notes is to trust our “inner healthy voice.” This voice advocates for us and is not self-critical. We also should access the voice of reason and encouragement, and it builds self-esteem. Richo equates this self- message to our kindly aunt or uncle that talks to you in supportive comforting way showing understanding rather than the message to rebuke ourselves for moments of weakness. In addition, this self-advocacy voice and self-talk replaces messages of saying the worst will happen with a message “I have it in me to handle whatever happens.”
Another cognitive tool that the author notes is that indeed, it is human to take things personally, when they are aimed at us that way, and we are triggered. Richo notes that “a healthy practice is to feel our grief about how someone has hurt or offended us to say “ouch“ and validate those immediate feelings will help us to shift and move on.
“Triggers” by David Rico provides a clear understanding of our personal Triggers, how to handle them, and is a great resource for collaborative professionals as we navigate this challenging work and our life challenges.
